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August 6, 2013


How are you feeling? As a social worker, I have asked that question countless times. As a ‘regular’ human, I have had that question asked of me countless times. But the truth is so few people ever take the time to reply to honestly.

It takes time, introspection and mindfulness to be able to truthfully get in touch with your feelings. It also takes courage. It is difficult to put into words why so many of us are afraid to face our feelings.

It isn’t the type of fear one has of physical danger, however. It is more like an anxious type of fear that propels us into some type of self-protective mode that involves avoiding confronting any of the not so wonderful feelings we may harbor.

I don’t pretend to be someone who has mastered the degree of courage required to dig deep and look inside all the time. But, I have become much less resistant to stilling myself and just existing without having to talk to someone or jump when the phone chirps or update my status.

There is something so freeing about sitting in silence and just existing, with my focus being inward instead of outside myself. I find it interesting that the process itself doesn’t hold anything that really makes me feel fearful, but thinking about it produces a lot of anxiety.

The time I devote to just being still is one of the only things I have that belongs just to me. It isn’t for anybody other than me. Interestingly, that way of thinking is one of the things that caused me to feel fearful and anxious. I didn’t have a clue as to how to just “BE” just for the sake of being, without any specific intention or cause other than that.



I am quite certain that millions of people tuned in last night to watch the final episode of this summer season of The Bachelorette. If you’re not one of them, I won’t spoil it for you by giving away who was chosen. Rather, during the final days prior to making her decision, Desiree Hartsock broke down emotionally and shared her feelings of insecurity because she felt unworthy of having someone in her life who was willing to love her as much as she loved them.

My getting to the point where I am with regard to granting myself permission to just be in silence is just like that! I struggled with believing I was worthy of the right to “JUST EXIST.” Sometimes I still do, but I’m learning.

We all have the right to just exist. We are here on this earth and we are uniquely ourselves. We ARE worthy. Ironically, it is by finding this inner sanctuary that we become more capable of manifesting other things in the outer aspects of our lives.

We learn to tap into our inner strength because we learn to see what lies within and face that strength. If we don’t face it, then we don’t recognize it and cannot access it as readily.

So, I invite you to find the courage to still yourself and journey into that place of silence where creation takes place.


I’m a licensed clinical social worker and have worked extensively as a counselor with children, adolescents, couples and families. I combine professional experience in the mental health field along with my love of writing to provide insight into real-life experiences and relationships. I hope my down-to-earth approach to living a happier, more meaningful life is easy to understand and just as easy to start implementing right away for positive results!

  1. i listen to a lot of Zinn for meditation! love the quote

    • Me too!!!

      Glad you enjoyed the post.

      Keep reading and I’ll keep writing…


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